Bruce Wrenn August 2023
Dear Friend,
Although we don’t personally know each other, we share a good friend who loves you and is praying for you in your crises. Our mutual friend wants to share with you a search for an answer to the question of does God care for us as we go through periods of intense personal suffering. As inadequate as my response may be, I want to try to provide some perspective from my own experience, to address this most challenging of questions: Does God really care?
I will try to address this question by recounting my own contemplations when facing three critical points in my journey of faith: “Does God always answer my prayers?;” “Can God be trusted?;” and How to be at Peace in the Midst of Adversity [or grief]?” Each of these issues provides intense existential challenges to someone’s faith. Combined, they represent a possible milestone event in our spiritual life going forward.
Does God always answer our prayers?
In an essay I wrote in 2020 I asked the question: Does God always answer our prayers? I wondered about this, because of an experience I had when receiving treatment for my cancer at the University of Michigan. A procedure that I prayed would go well turned out anything but well. Did my prayer go unanswered by God?
What I might have previously seen as evidence of unanswered prayer was based on what I could see (and feel) taking place. Nowadays, I do not use visible evidence to determine if the prayer is being answered. Rather, I focus my mind on God’s unfailing love. Consider what other Bible writers with personal experience have to say about their encounters with God’s unfailing love in their lives:
“In your unfailing love you will lead the people you have redeemed. In your strength you will guide them to your holy dwelling.” Exodus 15:13
Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,” says the Lord, who has compassion on you. Isaiah 54:10
But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. Psalm 13:5
But the eyes of the Lord are on those who fear him, on those whose hope is in his unfailing love, Psalm 33:18
When I said, “My foot is slipping,” your unfailing love, Lord, supported me. Psalm 94:18
Biblegateway documents that the term “unfailing love” is used 39 times in the Bible to refer to God’s loving care for us. The people in the Bible verses above show an unshakable, confident belief that God hears their prayers and is answering those prayers by guiding us on the best path, no matter what the visible evidence suggests. The bottom line is that when it comes to spiritual matters, just because I can’t see something doesn’t mean it isn’t there (e.g., see 2 Kings 6:16-17):
16 “Don’t be afraid,” the prophet answered. “Those who are with us are more than those who are with them.”
17 And Elisha prayed, “Open his eyes, Lord, so that he may see.” Then the Lord opened the servant’s eyes, and he looked and saw the hills full of horses and chariots of fire all around Elisha.
The author of Hebrews in Chapter 11, the Hall of Faith” members chapter, talks about faith as being “certain of what we do not see,”(verse 1), and goes on to say in verse 6 that “without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to Him must believe he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek Him.” So, what pleases God is for us to seek Him so earnestly that by faith we are certain that He is rewarding us for that faith, even if we do not see that reward (i.e., we are (or become) “certain of what we do not see”).
For Job, faith meant trusting in God’s goodness even when nothing good was happening in his life (remember, Job was simultaneously dealing with economic catastrophe, the death of all his children and workers, and a personal health crisis Job 1:12-22, 2:7-8). Though there was no tangible evidence that God was present in his life, Job was able to say: “Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him.” NKJV. Pretty remarkable reaction to his disastrous condition, especially when he thought God must have brought the disasters on him instead of Satan, not being aware of the conversation between God and Satan in heaven. Later, while debating with his “friends “ about the reasons for his troubles, Job makes and even more remarkable statement:
25 For I know that my Redeemer lives,
And He shall stand at last on the earth;
26 And after my skin is destroyed, this I know, That in my flesh I shall see God,
27 Whom I shall see for myself, and my eyes shall behold, and not another. How my heart yearns within me!
Job:25-27
What is surprising about this statement is that when the book of Job was written, Israel did not have a well-developed doctrine of the resurrection (some scholars believe that Job was the first book of the Bible). The Life Application Bible made this comment on this proclamation from Job:
“Job said: “In my flesh I will see God.” In Job’s situation, it seemed unlikely to him that he would, in his flesh, see God. And that’s just the point of Job’s faith! He was confident that God’s justice would triumph, even if it would take a miracle like resurrection to accomplish this.”
By faith, Job trusted that God would make all things new in the end, resurrecting Him and His children, recreating him with an immortal body, and restoring His creation imperishable. Job had this belief with no tangible evidence upon which to support such a miraculous future.
My essay “Does God always answer our prayers” ended this way:
When we trust God to deliver His unfailing love in all its manifestations to His beloved children, we don’t have to have our prayers answered the way we would wish in order to know He cares for us. I trust God more than myself when it comes to knowing what I need most, or even want most. In the fullness of time all will be clear, and our unfailing trust in His unfailing love will be forever validated. I am not the sharpest pencil in the box, but I have learned a few things in the past 10 years of my battle with an incurable cancer, and this is definitely one of them.
Addendum 4/21/22
A CT scan in 2020 revealed I had eight metastatic sarcoma tumors: four in my lungs, two in my liver, one in my pancreas and one in my spine. I can honestly report that when I received this news my faith in God’s unfailing love did not waver. He had been with me through the adversity of my health journey for ten years at that point and He was not going to abandon me at that stage:
“Never will I leave you;
never will I forsake you.”
So we say with confidence,
“The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid.
What can [this disease] do to me?” Hebrews 13:5-6
And, as I write this addendum two years [in 2020] after these sequence of events described above, I am still the object of God’s unfailing love, a beloved child who believes my prayers are heard and answered by my heavenly father in ways I could not imagine or even know how to ask for, and still have confidence that just because I can’t see something doesn’t mean it isn’t there.
On the day I called, you answered me,
you increased my strength of soul.
Though I walk in the midst of trouble,
you preserve me against the wrath of my enemies;
you stretch out your hand, and your right hand delivers me. Psalm 138:3,7
Now, this is not a full answer to the question of where is God and why does He seem to be silent in during my spiritual battle, but it does provide some insight as to how some people (Job and me in this case) process these questions, i.e., we believe God’s unfailing love is there even when don’t see evidence of it in the midst of our suffering and grief.
Can God be Trusted?
All this leads to another essay I wrote, which is Can God be Trusted? Satan would love to convince us that the answer to this question is: “Absolutely not, which is why you should trust your senses instead of God’s Word. Would a God of unfailing love leave you in your misery with no remedy? Do what Job’s wife said and curse God and die. God doesn’t deserve your trust.”
My search for an answer to the question lead me to a different conclusion.
The phrase “trust in God” or “trust in the Lord” appears many times in Scripture. David speaks about trusting in God several times in Psalm 22:
Psalm 22
1 My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, so far from my cries of anguish?
2 My God, I cry out by day, but you do not answer, by night, but I find no rest.[b]
4 In you our ancestors put their trust; they trusted and you delivered them.
5 To you they cried out and were saved; in you they trusted and were not put to shame.
6 But I am a worm and not a man, scorned by everyone, despised by the people.
7 All who see me mock me; they hurl insults, shaking their heads.
8 “He trusts in the Lord,” they say, “let the Lord rescue him. Let him deliver him, since he delights in him.”
9 Yet you brought me out of the womb; you made me trust in you, even at my mother’s breast.
10 From birth I was cast on you; from my mother’s womb you have been my God.
11 Do not be far from me, for trouble is near and there is no one to help.
Psalm 22 is widely regarded as a prophetic Psalm, quoted by Christ on the cross. As such, David (and Christ) feels abandoned, and those around him think him abandoned, but he is seeking God in his prayer. He is still saying “My God.” David is speaking to God as one severely afflicted and abused by those who point out in their derision that his trust in God has been misplaced, because God would have no favor for someone so unworthy as he. In contrast, David’s ancestors put their trust in God and their trust was rewarded. Everyone witnessed their deliverance as their trust was validated. They trusted God “and were not put to shame.”
David feels so low in his troubles that he feels worthless—more worm than man. Those looking on see his suffering as a sign of God’s judgement: His trust in God will not be rewarded. He has been justly forsaken.
But David knows God better than they do, and the verses 9-11 reveal David’s trust in God is founded on an understanding of God’s character, beautifully described by David in Psalms 103 and 145. It was God who took the divine initiative to give David a trusting heart even as he was being weaned (“you made me trust in you, even at my mother’s breast”).
In verses 23-24 we see how David’s trust in God is manifested, even while he remains afflicted:
23 You who fear the Lord, praise him! All you descendants of Jacob, honor him! Revere him, all you descendants of Israel!
24 For he has not despised or scorned the suffering of the afflicted one; he has not hidden his face from him but has listened to his cry for help.
This is what a long and deep trust in God looks like: the experience of walking close to God your entire life builds a strong trust in his love, goodness and mercy, so that going through the crucible of suffering still results in praising God for His listening to your current cry for help. Trust in God is justified, even when you might not understand His ways or His plan for our life or see the reward in the here and now. God can be trusted to fulfill his purpose and plan for our life, according to His infinite wisdom and lovingkindness.
8 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord.
9 “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.
10 As the rain and the snow come down from heaven, and do not return to it without watering the earth and making it bud and flourish, so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
11 so is my word that goes out from my mouth: It will not return to me empty, but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it. Isaiah 55:8-11 NIV
8 The Lord will work out his plans for my life—for your loving-kindness, Lord, continues forever. Psalm 138:8 TLB
This brings us to the Oxford dictionary’s definition of trust:
the belief that somebody/something is good, sincere, honest, etc. and will not try to harm or trick you
to believe what somebody says even though you do not have any proof or evidence to show that it is true
Clearly, David’s version of trust in God fits both definitions.
Contrast David’s type of trust to that of the Israelites being led out of captivity in Egypt:
“And when the Israelites saw the mighty hand of the Lord displayed against the Egyptians, the people feared the Lord and put their trust in him and in Moses his servant.” Exodus 14:31
The Israelites, in Exodus 14:31, put their trust in the Lord because they were eyewitnesses to His mighty hand at work in their lives. But here is what they said to Moses when Pharoah’s armies were closing in on them at the Red Sea:
“They said to Moses, “Was it because there were no graves in Egypt that you brought us to the desert to die? What have you done to us by bringing us out of Egypt? Didn’t we say to you in Egypt, ‘Leave us alone; let us serve the Egyptians’? It would have been better for us to serve the Egyptians than to die in the desert!” Exodus 14:11-12
This was after God had worked mighty miracles to deliver them from Egyptian slavery. Then He interposed again on their behalf, opening the Red Sea for them as a highway to safety while simultaneously swallowing the Egyptian army. Yet even then, their next crisis evoked the following response:
“But the people were thirsty for water there, and they grumbled against Moses. They said, “Why did you bring us up out of Egypt to make us and our children and livestock die of thirst?” Exodus 17:3
It appears the Israelites trusted in God only when the Oxford Dictionary’s first definition was immediately obvious, but not under the second definition. However, they had little time to get to know God when these events happened. Their faith had not matured at this point.
So, it is easy to trust God when you are experiencing His mercies in the present, but can you trust Him the same when there appears to be no evidence that your appeals to your trust in His goodness are bearing fruit? Perhaps only a mature faith can trust in the absence of evidence.
When we accept Jesus’ invitation for the Holy Spirit to abide in us and us in Jesus each day, we see and feel the Spirit at work in our lives. We are now loving when we know from our past that we weren’t loving under the same conditions; we are now kind when we were previously indifferent to someone in need; we are generous when we used to be selfish. God can be trusted to abide in us when we sincerely ask for His Spirit. We also trust Him to keep His promise when He stands at the door of our hearts and knocks:
“Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me.” Revelation 3:20
The transformative power of the Spirit abiding in us provides strong evidence that our lives bear witness that God can be trusted to keep His promises. But what about when as the Oxford dictionary says “you do not have any proof or evidence to show that it is true”? Do we have unshakable trust in Him when the evidence isn’t immediately present to prove our trust is founded? Does our heart rate and blood pressure increase when we get bad news, or is our default reaction to say “Lord, I trust your unfailing love will prevail, and you will fulfill your purpose for my life, no matter what the outcome of this news”? Do we always believe Romans 8:28 to be true in our life, even when we do not see how the ”good” can possibly emerge out of the “bad?” This is where faith, “the certainty of what we do not see” (Heb 11:1) comes in.
My essay, “Can God be Trusted” explored a number of ways this question can be answered: What exactly does it mean to “trust in the Lord”? I will limit my answers to those which seem most pertinent to this discussion.
We are trusting in the Lord when we:
• Trust that He remembers us
Isaiah 49:15-16
15 Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you!
16 See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands; your walls are ever before me.”
Trust that His plan has always been that we will be in heaven with Him
2 peter 3:9 The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.
Isaiah 25:9 In that day they will say, “Surely this is our God; we trusted in him, and he saved us. This is the Lord, we trusted in him; let us rejoice and be glad in his salvation.”
Trust in Him even when the news seems irreversibly bad
Psalm 112:7 They will have no fear of bad news; their hearts are steadfast, trusting in the Lord.
Steadfast trust is what is needed under such circumstances, but how does someone’s heart become steadfast? I believe the answer to this question is related to my recent study of James 1:2-4. Here is an abbreviated version of that study:
“2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds,
3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.
4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1:2-4 NIV
How are we to understand this verse in light of our own experiences in suffering? Is it even possible to consider our suffering “pure joy”?
The problem I had was not knowing exactly how I could feel joyful about going through a trial, particularly a trial like dealing with an incurable disease such as Leiomyosarcoma. I now think I know what James meant.
The joy for me wasn’t going through the trial itself, it was seeing God at work in my life to bring Romans 8:28 true trial after trial, for me and for others. The consequence of this was to increase my faith and trust in God’s providence and cause me to see more reasons to express my gratitude to Him.
So, I knew what James meant about persevering through the trial in order to experience a maturation of my faith. The trial, or affliction, was the vehicle God used to get me to this destination. A mature faith allows you to see the light of God’s Goodness through the darkness of your adversity.
God is there even in the worst heat of your crucible. As Betsie Ten Boom said in these last words to her sister Corrie in a Nazi prison camp:
"There is no pit so deep that God’s love is not deeper still."
My experience was seeing God’s providence under severe adversity, resulting in a steadfast trust in Him keeping his promises to always be there with me. This maturation of faith really does mean you have no fear of bad news because your trust in His presence is always confirmed.
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Trust in His Word when the evidence appears to argue for you to believe otherwise
Proverbs 3:5
Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;Luke 5
4 When he had finished speaking, he said to Simon, “Put out into deep water, and let down the nets for a catch.”5 Simon answered, “Master, we’ve worked hard all night and haven’t caught anything. But because you say so, I will let down the nets.”
6 When they had done so, they caught such a large number of fish that their nets began to break. 7 So they signaled their partners in the other boat to come and help them, and they came and filled both boats so full that they began to sink. 8 When Simon Peter saw this, he fell at Jesus’ knees and said, “Go away from me, Lord; I am a sinful man!” 9 For he and all his companions were astonished at the catch of fish they had taken, 10 and so were James and John, the sons of Zebedee, Simon’s partners.
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Trust that God is with us and can make us prosper under extreme adversity
Isaiah 41:10
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.Isaiah 43:2
When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.
Psalms 73:23-24
Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand.
24 You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory.
Hebrews 13:5-6 “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”
6 So we say with confidence,
“The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?”
Jeremiah 17:7-8
7 “But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him.
8 They will be like a tree planted by the water that sends out its roots by the stream. It does not fear when heat comes; its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought and never fails to bear fruit.”
• Trust that God will be faithful in keeping His eternal covenant with us
It is not possible to do justice to describing God’s eternal covenant with humankind in this short essay exploring the question “Can God be Trusted?” Many entire books have been devoted to the topic of the covenants. However, I cannot end my exploration of what it means to trust God without giving some attention to why it is so important that we understand the covenant God instituted with us, and why trusting God to keep it is foundational to our existence and eternal future.
For a comprehensive and authoritative exploration of the Biblical covenants, I refer you to Skip MacCarty, In Granite or Ingrained? What the Old and New Covenants Reveal about the Gospel, the Law, and the Sabbath, (Andrews University Press Berrien Springs, MI], 2007, 327 pages). Here is a short excerpt from the book that provides a glimpse into the heart of God who established the Eternal Covenant:
“Covenant has its origins in the relationship of love that has existed among God the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit from all eternity. Trinity love constitutes the “everlasting covenant” of which every divinely initiated covenant in human history is a unique adaptation to specific time and place....God’s covenants with humanity may be defined generally as His whole-souled commitment in love to their ultimate welfare and happiness, with expectations of their whole-souled commitment in love, loyalty, and obedience to Him in return. God’s sacrificial commitment during the reign of sin (from the fall of Adam to the second coming of Jesus) to restore humanity to an eternal hope may be termed “the covenant of redemption” or “the everlasting gospel.” The “covenant of redemption”/ “everlasting gospel”—God’s plan of salvation for the eternal salvation of human beings—is timeless and universal, having existed in the heart of God before time began, and having never changed since its implementation at the fall of Adam.” (p.9-10)
God can be trusted to keep His part of the everlasting covenant, because He has made it possible for us to keep our part:
Hebrews 13
20 Now may the God of peace, who through the blood of the eternal covenant brought back from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great Shepherd of the sheep, 21 equip you with everything good for doing his will, and may he work in us what is pleasing to him, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen.
• Trust that He will give us a peace that defies understanding
Philippians 4:6-7
6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
John 14:27
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
This last manifestation of trusting God to give you comfort and peace in the midst of searing emotional pain and loss, is one of, if not the, most challenging expressions of faith we can ever face. Which leads me the last of my essays, which deals with being at peace when suffering extreme trials, such as you are facing. Here are some thoughts from that essay:
How to be at peace in the middle of adversity
To me, one large component of peace is trusting in God’s tender loving mercy for us. The better I know God, the more I am aware of just how tender his love is for me; how he sees me as a fragile beloved child who needs special care to avoid being harmed when subjected to the vicissitudes of this life. Isaiah 28:23-29 provides an portrait of God’s loving tenderhearted way of treating his fragile children by using an analogy of a framer carefully harvesting fragile crops. My Life Application Bible says this about these verses:: “The farmer uses special tools to plant and harvest tender herbs so he will not destroy them. He takes into account how fragile they are. In the same way God takes all our individual circumstances and weaknesses into account. He deals with each of us sensitively.”
Some other Biblical references to God’s tender mercies include:
Jeremiah, in his book of Lamentations (3:21-23) over the destruction of Jerusalem in 586BC by the Babylonians, said this through his tears:
21 But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope:
22 The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, his mercies never come to an end;
23 they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. (NRSV)
Hosea (11:4), records these words of God speaking to His wayward people:
I led them with cords of human kindness, with ties of love. To them I was like one who lifts a little child to the cheek, and I bent down to feed them. (NIV)
Paul, in the twelfth chapter of his first letter to the Corinthians talks about spiritual gifts God gives to us and compares the human body to the church, the body of Christ. Then, in chapter 13, his famous discourse on love, he continues the theme of relating the Divine to humanity by talking about the nature of Divine love. Thus, our love for one another should be like God’s love for us: “patient, kind, protective, trustworthy, persevering and unfailing” (1 Corinthians 13:4- 8). These are not what Paul only wished love could be, they are what he knew love to be as God loved him. Tender, gentle, unbounded, timeless love. Being loved like this leads to gratitude, trust, and reciprocal love for the One who loves you. All this causes you to be able to be at peace because you are convinced of the soon coming reality when Love will rule over everything forever.
So, what does all this have to do with our ability to be at peace when overwhelmed by troubles? For me, feeling, internalizing and trusting in God’s tender merciful love for fragile me provides a sense of peace unlike anything worldly-based peace could ever do.
I believe this is what Paul was talking about in 2 Corinthians 4:18 when he says “So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever.” Paul “fixes his thoughts” (his “gaze”) on Jesus instead of the troubles that constantly beset him, and Paul thereby knows a peace that transcends the understanding (Philippians 4:7) of those who don’t acknowledge the love of Jesus, and who can see only the troubles that surround them.
For Paul, and for me, in our trials this is where peace infuses me, the foundation of which is the very real experience of being the object of love from a God who knows me better than I know myself (Psalm 139); who has known and loved me with an “everlasting love” and who has drawn me to him with “unfailing kindness”; who “holds me to his cheek” and “bends down to feed me;” whose “steadfast love for me never ceases” and whose “mercies never come to an end”; who “delights” in showering those mercies on me; who “knows my frame is frail” and that I “came from dust” and must be treated with the utmost tenderheartedness and spoken to with a “gentle quiet voice.” All of this “patient, kind, protective, trustworthy, persevering and unfailing” love keeps me at peace even when contending with overwhelming grief.
These verses remind us that we should never lose sight of the ultimate consequence of our choosing to walk with God holding us by our right hand throughout life—where He is, there we will be also (“afterward you will take me into glory” Psalm 73:24). Our trials on this earth keep us yearning for our heavenly home where there is no more pain, suffering, grief or tears, and no memories of the troubles that produced them. That assurance gives us a very real sense of peace while in the throughs of our worst emotional pains.
To better understand how it is possible to be at peace while grieving the loss of a loved one, consider the scene when Jesus returned to Bethany after waiting until Lazarus died (John 11:17- 44):
17 On his arrival, Jesus found that Lazarus had already been in the tomb for four days.
18 Now Bethany was less than two miles[a] from Jerusalem,
19 and many Jews had come to Martha and Mary to comfort them in the loss of their brother.
20 When Martha heard that Jesus was coming, she went out to meet him, but Mary stayed at home.
21 “Lord,” Martha said to Jesus, “if you had been here, my brother would not have died.
22 But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask.”
23 Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.”
24 Martha answered, “I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.”
25 Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die;
26 and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?”
27 “Yes, Lord,” she replied, “I believe that you are the Messiah, the Son of God, who is to come into the world.”
28 After she had said this, she went back and called her sister Mary aside. “The Teacher is here,” she said, “and is asking for you.”
29 When Mary heard this, she got up quickly and went to him.
30 Now Jesus had not yet entered the village, but was still at the place where Martha had met him.
31 When the Jews who had been with Mary in the house, comforting her, noticed how quickly she got up and went out, they followed her, supposing she was going to the tomb to mourn there.
32 When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.”
33 When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled.
34 “Where have you laid him?” he asked. “Come and see, Lord,” they replied.
35 Jesus wept.
36 Then the Jews said, “See how he loved him!”
37 But some of them said, “Could not he who opened the eyes of the blind man have kept this man from dying?”
38 Jesus, once more deeply moved, came to the tomb. It was a cave with a stone laid across the entrance.
39 “Take away the stone,” he said. “But, Lord,” said Martha, the sister of the dead man, “by this time there is a bad odor, for he has been there four days.”
40 Then Jesus said, “Did I not tell you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?”
41 So they took away the stone. Then Jesus looked up and said, “Father, I thank you that you have heard me.
42 I knew that you always hear me, but I said this for the benefit of the people standing here, that they may believe that you sent me.”
43 When he had said this, Jesus called in a loud voice, “Lazarus, come out!”
44 The dead man came out, his hands and feet wrapped with strips of linen, and a cloth around his face.
Jesus said to them, “Take off the grave clothes and let him go.”
Here we see the difference between the peace that Jesus offers to us and the secular definition of peace. While Martha is greatly disturbed and grieving over Lazarus’ death, she trusts in Jesus as the Messiah to be the ultimate source of eternal life: 21 “Lord,” Martha said to Jesus, “if you had been here, my brother would not have died. 22 But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask.” “I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.” “I believe that you are the Messiah, the Son of God, who is to come into the world.”
Her faith and trust in Jesus as the Redeemer provides the assurance that, while she does not understand why her brother had to die when Jesus could have restored his health, she can see the day when they will be reunited in heaven. That assurance that Jesus can be trusted to create that eternal reunion gives her the “peace of Jesus.” To Martha, grief becomes what Paul called “a momentary trouble” that is far outweighed by the eternal glory that we will know in heaven (2 Cor. 4:17). Trust in God provides that peace that transcends the understanding of non-believers who lack the hope of an eternity with God and those we have lost. In heaven we will never know suffering—only peace.
Also note that Jesus is also grieving the death of His friend Lazarus while assured of the inevitable resurrection and victory of God over death. That assurance gave Jesus the peace of God even while grieving the temporary loss of a good friend. Peace and grief are not mutually opposing states. God wants us to trust Him to keep us at peace in the midst of intense suffering in our earthy existence.
Isaiah describes the means by which we arrive at such a spiritual state of assurance: Isaiah 26:3-4
You will keep in perfect peace
[The person] whose mind is stayed on you, because [that person] trusts in you.
Trust in the Lord forever,
for the Lord, the Lord himself, is the Rock eternal.
To me this is saying the outpouring of emotion in prayers for God to show Himself in our agony, and to answer our appeal for help in relieving our pain, can lead to trusting in Him to respond those prayers, giving us His peace even when we don’t see the evidence we wanted that He is there. Prayer, trust and peace are inextricably interwoven.
This is not to say that we are freed from our intense grief. As noted, Jesus himself grieved for Lazarus even when He knew what was about to happen. Grief is the human condition reflective of our fallen state. God never wanted us to experience grief. His plan for eternal life and joy was upended when disobedience and sin entered the human experience through Adam and Eve’s freedom of choice.
But God also promised it would not always be the eternal fate of humankind to know grief, “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away” (Rev 21:4).
Honest prayers, like David’s in Psalm 22, are part of the maturation process of how our faith grows stronger and produces trust and peace that surpasses human understanding. Although hurting and confused by God’s perceived absence, like David, we trust that He hears and shares our pain of loss, answers our prayers for help in dealing with our grief, and will bring to pass His promises of an eternal reunion with the loved ones we grieved for on this earth. This kind of trust will be rewarded when Christ returns to make all things new. Such trust will not be disappointed by a God whose love is unfailing. God’s love for us will never diminish, never end, and from which we can never be separated.
I pray that you will be comforted in your suffering and find the God of unfailing love and peace is right there with you in the midst of your pain. He has been there with me for the duration and I know He will be there with you too. He can be trusted.
(May) the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7
Now may our Lord Jesus Christ himself, and God our Father, who loved us and gave us eternal comfort and good hope through grace, comfort your hearts and establish them in every good work and word. 2 Thessalonians 2:16-17
2 This is what the Lord says:
3 “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.
9 I will lead you beside streams of water on a level path where you will not stumble,
12 You will be like a well-watered garden, and you will sorrow no more.
13 I will turn your mourning into gladness;
I will give you comfort and joy instead of sorrow.
Jeremiah 31 Selected verses for those who are grieving
7 [Most] blessed is the person who believes in, trusts in, and relies on the Lord, and whose hope and confidence the Lord is.
8 That person is like a tree planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water. Such a tree is not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought. Its leaves stay green, and it never stops producing fruit. Jeremiah 17:7-8 Compellation
Some Final Thoughts
When we are suffering through an experience so terrible that we question whether God can be trusted to keep His Romans 8:28 promise to work all things together for the good, we are focused on how we feel rather than who God is. We are not the first to think this way. Consider Psalm 77, written by Asaph thousands of years ago:
Psalm 77
1 I cried out to God for help; I cried out to God to hear me.
2 When I was in distress, I sought the Lord; at night I stretched out untiring hands, and I would not be comforted.
3 I remembered you, God, and I groaned; I meditated, and my spirit grew faint.
4 You kept my eyes from closing; I was too troubled to speak.
5 I thought about the former days, the years of long ago;
6 I remembered my songs in the night. My heart meditated and my spirit asked:
7 “Will the Lord reject forever? Will he never show his favor again?
8 Has his unfailing love vanished forever? Has his promise failed for all time?
9 Has God forgotten to be merciful? Has he in anger withheld his compassion?”
Realize that God made certain that Asaph’s questions in verses 8 and 9 would be included in the Bible. He wants us to know that we are not the first person to question whether God still cares for us. When we are so deep in our pain and despair, we are challenged to maintain our trust in God’s unfailing love for us when there is no tangible evidence that it is present (cf. Job’s plight when in everything in his life falls apart in an instant).
But look at what Asaph writes as he shifts his focus from himself and his misery, to God’s character and history of caring for us:
10 Then I thought, “To this I will appeal: the years when the Most High stretched out his right hand.
11 I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago.
12 I will consider all your works and meditate on all your mighty deeds.”
13 Your ways, God, are holy. What god is as great as our God?
14 You are the God who performs miracles; you display your power among the peoples.
15 With your mighty arm you redeemed your people, the descendants of Jacob and Joseph.
20 You led your people like a flock by the hand of Moses and Aaron.
God’s goodness and mercy to His people has sustained us throughout our lives, and can He be trusted to continue to do that now, no matter what the immediate evidence to the contrary. God’s unfailing love has not vanished. His promises for our welfare has not failed to be true. His character has not changed. We need but remember:
22 The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, his mercies never come to an end;
23 they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.
24 “The Lord is my portion,” says my soul, “therefore I will hope in him.”
25 The Lord is good to those who wait for him, to the soul that seeks him.
26 It is good that one should wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord. (Lamentations 3:22-26 NRSV)
Our conclusion to the questions: Does God Care?, Can we still trust in His unfailing love to bring all things (even the terrible things that are occurring now) together for the good?; is that God does not change—He remains the God described by David (a close friend of God) in Psalm 145:
Psalm 145
A psalm of praise. Of David.
1 I will exalt you, my God the King; I will praise your name for ever and ever.
2 Every day I will praise you and extol your name for ever and ever.
3 Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom.
4 One generation commends your works to another; they tell of your mighty acts.
5 They speak of the glorious splendor of your majesty and I will meditate on your wonderful works.
6 They tell of the power of your awesome works and I will proclaim your great deeds.
7 They celebrate your abundant goodness and joyfully sing of your righteousness.
8 The Lord is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love.
9 The Lord is good to all; he has compassion on all he has made.
10 All your works praise you, Lord; your faithful people extol you.
11 They tell of the glory of your kingdom and speak of your might,
12 so that all people may know of your mighty acts and the glorious splendor of your kingdom.
13 Your kingdom is an everlasting kingdom, and your dominion endures through all generations. The Lord is trustworthy in all he promises and faithful in all he does.
14 The Lord upholds all who fall and lifts up all who are bowed down.
15 The eyes of all look to you, and you give them their food at the proper time.
16 You open your hand and satisfy the desires of every living thing.
17 The Lord is righteous in all his ways and faithful in all he does.
18 The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.
19 He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them.
20 The Lord watches over all who love him, but all the wicked he will destroy.
21 My mouth will speak in praise of the Lord. Let every creature praise his holy name for ever and ever. (Psalm 145 NIV)
Yes, God does care.
20 Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. 21 Glory to him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! Amen. (Ephesians 3:20-21 NLT)
